Dovidenia

     I am at the Vienna airport where I arrived at midnight last night. With part of the night spent strategically arranged across two waiting room chairs and my giant suitcase, and the other part on a rock hard sleeping platform at the gate, I am probably not going to make much sense. That is however apropos for my state of mind right now. I honestly have no idea what is going on. I left Bratislava last night at 11. I will be boarding my flight to Frankfort in half an hour. After a brief layover, and a nearly 10 hour flight directly to Minneapolis, I'll be home, for the first time in over 5 months. It simply doesn't seem real.

    
     Making the decision to leave Bratislava and Bilgym was one of the hardest choices I've ever had to make in my life. I've really enjoyed my time here, despite the obvious challenges. All the same, I've been really looking forward to being home. At least, I was, until a few days ago. Ever since I made the decision to leave, and especially since accepting the position in Honduras, I've been chomping at the bit. With my departure in the near future, the things which had been only minor annoyances previously were really grating on me. My lack of Slovak was especially frustrating, my occasional impatience with the students and bureaucracy of the school grew more pronounced.
    
     But then something changed. I started living with graduation goggles, at least as far as school went. I was reminded that there were times when staying didn't seem impossible, when I could see myself here for another year. Saying goodbye to my students, hearing their appreciation of the work I had put in to their classes, needing to realize that I won't see them every day anymore, was hard. Walking around Old Town, trying to burn the images into my memory because I have no idea when I'll be back to see them again, was hard.
     I thought it was going to be easier. It wasn't until I started counting lasts (last Friday in Bratislava, last day with the students, etc) that I realized just how much I was going to miss this place. I hadn't known just how attached I had grown to the people, sights, and life in Bratislava. So ever since then, thinking about leaving has been bittersweet, where before it was, honestly, just sweet.
    
     I'm not second guessing my decision. I know that I belong first at home, and then in Honduras next year. I'm confident in that. But now, for the first time, I'm realizing how profoundly I've been affected by my time here. I've known since the moment I was offered the job back in December that this was going to offer an incredible learning experience. I learned how to teach by teaching, an experience that has been both terrifying and marvelous. I expected that, and have not been disappointed.
     But there is so much else that has happened, things that wouldn't make sense to you even if I had the words to describe them. I am so blessed to have met the people I did, and to have taught the students I taught. If they have learned half as much from me as I have from them, I would consider myself successful.
   
So dakujeme, Bratislava, for everything you were and everything you will continue to be.